Bento #104: Must Eat Greens

Lunchtime!  We should not post Our previous lunches so close to Current Lunch Time (it is about 11:30 in the morning) as it is making Us very hungry.

We went (are still going?) through a bit of a "greens" phase.  So here you see the King's basic cooked greens, some steamed carrots, a square hard-boiled egg, and a bit of daikon pickle.  In the back tier is plain short-grain rice with furikake.  In the coffee mug is tea, and there on the left is a chocolate.  One of Our officemates was given chocolates by a student, and he was kind enough to share the love.

So.  First, let Us talk about square eggs.  The square egg was made via a square egg mold, which was given to Us for Christmas by the Dear Friend of the Kingdom, L.  The square eggs are charming and do indeed take up less lunchbox room than an ovoid egg!  Hooray!  Dear L also gave Us Baconnaise, which is both delicious and dangerous and We think that We will have a hard time living without it now, as Baconnaise and egg sandwiches are almost too good to be believed.

Now, let Us talk about greens.  We love them mucho.  Here is how We make them:

• About 1 T. olive oil
• 1 large sweet onion, diced
• Greens, washed and sliced.  Anything sturdy: kale, collards, chard, etc.  Spinach is too delicate for this.
• soy sauce--a couple tablespoons
• rice vinegar--also a couple tablespoons
• red pepper flakes--under about 1/2 t. doesn't really make this "hot," just flavorful.  If you want perceptible heat, by all means, chuck in tons.
• optional: broth, mushrooms, kombu, sweet pepper, sesame oil, anything else that adds umami

Heat your oil in a pan large enough to hold all your greens.  Chuck in the onions and saute.  If you're using anything else that needs softening, like mushrooms or whatever, throw them in now too.  When all your crunchy things are softened, chuck in everything else.  If your greens aren't freshly washed, you may need to add a bit of water or broth.  Steam for about 10-15 minutes if you like them with a little heft left to them; longer if they're overcooked.

Our hands-down favorite way to eat these greens is this: put either some brown rice or a couple of slices of toast in the bottom of a bowl.  Meanwhile, cook an egg sunny-side up.  You're looking for a very runny egg.  When the egg is done, scoop a bunch of greens w/ their broth over your rice/toast, then put the egg on top.  The yolk should run into the greens broth should run into the base and make everything slightly slimy and v. delicious. 

If you use toast, it's kind of like a weird hot greens commerical--which is awesome, as one of the things We miss most about not eating meat, freakishly enough, is the hot commerical, which is delicious and regional to Our childhood and thus carries a huge nostalgia value.

Update:

Blogger is giving Us fits, and We cannot post a comment on Our own blog. #wtf  So here's Our response to Lisa:

That message board was hilarious! And did you note, it mentions Our very own small hometown? Much love for the birthplace of the king! And we can indeed confirm, despite what that one Very Officious Person on the message board says, that Mike's Cafe in Marshall, MN does indeed offer both hot beef and hot turkey commercials. Our very own Queen and Queen Mother eat there about once a week, and they often get the half-commercial, as a whole is quite a lot of food.

And as We understand the history of the commercial, it was meant as economical but filling lunchtime for working dudes, and therefore is supposed to be a lot of good, cheap food for, say, a construction worker. It's an open-faced sandwich where bread is on bottom, then roasted meat, then mashed potatoes, and gravy over all. Generally comes with a side of veg.

Bento #103: Fruit Salad

Here We see a lovely summery fruit salad made of yogurt, frozen cherries and blueberries, and underneath, apple and banana.   Alongside there's a nice warm mug of tea. 

Yogurt, it must be said, has almost miraculous properties.  Yogurt is an excellent device for repopulating one's innards with Charming Helper Bacteria after any sort of illness.  In fact, with certain digestive illnesses, dear yogurt can head the bad guys off at the pass, prevening some of the more unfortunate effects.  Our Royal Physician assures Us that yogurt, eaten regularly, helps prevent certain Lady Problems by reinforcing the Lady's own resistance.  Yogurt is an excellent Protein Delivery System for those who do not want to consume the Creature from Whence Yogurt Springs.  And, it must be said, that in Sunny FL, sometimes it becomes Very Diffiult to consume actual food, what with the heat and all, and dear Fruit and Yogurt Salad becomes invaluable at such times.

As summer rapidly approaches and the heat begins to build, Your King is bracing Herself for the time when she begins to live entirely on mangoes, yogurt, and fruit-juice popsicles while lying on the Castle Floor in Her underwear and Weeping Piteously.

Bento #102: TMT on Shame

Here, citizens, is the first part of this lunch: TMT on the end of what appears to be whole wheat shame, carrots, celery, and apple.

And here is the second: yogurt and frozen blueberries.  Well, not frozen anymore.  Ah, delcious yogurt.

Dearest citizens, We are sorry that it has taken Us so long to post more springtime lunches.  What can We say?  We were busy. 

In this semester, We stupidly assigned Ourself way more grading than We could keep up with.  We also went to Vegas to visit the Royal Family, We picked up running again, and We have been trying to nail out this prospectus so Our advisor does not light Us on fire.  All of which is to say, that Our dear little lunchtime parade has been neglected.  But this is good for you, as it means We now have a backlog of lunches to show you.  And this is the first.

Bento #101: Burger Time!

For this post, today We have a delicious burger-based lunch!  Along with the burger, which We will detail shortly, We have the eternal apple and carrots.  The water in Our bottle is cloudy because We have a shameful weakness for the Propel packets of powder that you chuck in a bottle and thus produce sports drink.  However, We put them in a full liter of water instead of the ridiculous 16 oz. they recommend.  That would produce a hideous thick syrup. 

Every now and then, We get a craving for a burger.  However, do We want actual animal product?  Clearly not!  So what is it We are missing?  The device, naturally!  So here is a stunt meat burger--We believe it's one of the Amy's ones, but We are not certain--on shame bread.  Underneath the burger is a nice thin layer of Rhinegeld, one of Our favorite grainy mustards.  On top is cheese that failed to melt, ketchup, and sweet pickled daikon radish.

Now wait a minute, you may say.  Sweet pickled daikon?  Isn't that stuff stinky and thus bad for burgerdom? Yes, dear citizen, it surely is stinky.  And it is also delicious, with a nice bitter/sour/sweet edge that, strangely enough, is perfect against ketchup.  As you will no doubt remember, there is a vast and abiding love of pickled items in the Sneaky Kingdom.  Frankly, if you soak anything in either salt or vinegar or both, We will probably eat it with joy.  And so We do indeed make many of Our own pickles, because honestly, the store thinks the only thing that can be pickled is cucumber.  Fools!

Bento #100: In Which King Asher Did Not Plan An Awesome Celebratory Lunch

Here is TMT with green onion, carrots as a nice little barrier, Irish soda bread, and an apple.

The soda bread is indeed homemade, but We think it is an error.  We made it because We wanted bread, stat! but did not want to have to knead or fuss about with biscuits.  The result: the world's biggest, heaviest biscuit.  It was okay, but deeply, profoundly dense.  And unfortunately, because of its crumbly-biscuity texture, cannot be sliced super-thin, which is what one does with super-dense bread.  So big hunks of too-dense bread product.  Kind of gross.  Kind of shameful, We think.

TMT, however, will never let Us down.

Bento #99: Split-Pea and Garlic Cheese Bread

Here We have a delicious soup lunch!  Every now and then, We get a freakishly intense craving for split pea soup.  And no surprise.  It's a delicious, protein-and-fiber heavy, warm food to eat during the sticky-cold FL winters.  So here is a thermos of homemade split pea soup, which We make in the Crock Pot, some of the ubiquitous carrots, and a super-delicious bread that We made when We and Our friends had a Sherlock-viewing party. 

Have you seen Sherlock?  It's this fantastic reboot of the Sherlock Holmes stories, but the gimmick is that it's not set in Victorian London, but modern-day London.  So instead of sending Watson aggravating notes, Sherlock sends him aggravating texts.  Ha!  It's charming.  Watson is the dude that was Arthur Dent in the Hitchhiker reboot, which is very pleasing; We love that actor's attention to body language.  And Holmes is played by--wait for it--Benedict Cumberbatch.  Isn't that the Best Name Ever?  Benedict Cumberbatch.  It's absolutely unreal!  And the dude does indeed do a wonderfully creepy/endearing Holmes, which We think is one of the benefits of the newer Sherlock versions--in the stories, Holmes is an utter jerk. Says the most awful, condescending things, besides being an addictive personality in about four different ways--which alwyas produces charming folks.  It's why House works so well--they demonstrate the jerky side of Holmes and the enabling side of Watson.  The Sherlock plots are new but full of fun easter eggs for people who are well read.

Here's the bread We made for that party: Garlic-Cheese Bread .  It was really, really tasty.

Bento #98: PB&J

We were a bit pressed for time at this point.  Here is an almond butter and jam sandwich on kingdom bread, a banana, and carrots.  There is tea in the cup and honey in the tea from the little bear.

Sometimes, it's hard to get out the door in the morning.  We explain this lunch thusly.